here's me having a good yell because my mom dared to put me down while i was still awake. it's saturday. so far i'm having a pretty good day. one of the comedy channels is running frasier episodes- all weekend long. oh yeah, i can dig it. yeah so yesterday i was super fussy. my mom was getting ready to pull her hair out, my grandad was cursing like a sailor and my gram was just trying everything to make me happy. my dad got a full report and he thinks i am broken. he is not sure he wants to return from florida. i was pretty worn out last night. after my bottle i went to bed and didn't wake up again until 2.30am. mom was pretty happy with that result. she changed me and gave me another bottle. since i had such a good sleep, i wasn't ready to go back to bed and staid up watching the crime and punishment channel until 5am. then i was up at 6, 7, and 9. my mom had a few choice words to say about that. she was going to take me to mass this morning but was too tired to function. at my 9am bottle the both of us ended up falling asleep. i woke up with milk drool all over my face, i'm lucky it wasn't mom drool. she was snoring away.
my new formula is going down ok. the only difference i can tell right now is- it makes me burp and fart like a champion. i let out a burp this morning which mom said would make danna bunny proud. she said i was more than a match for my uncle ricky in the fart department. who are these people and why does she keep talking about them? my gram is talking about taking me out later in my buggy. mom says- go for it.
more later if anything interesting happens.

i gotta be quick. mom is in the shower and gram thinks i am sleeping. no picture from today but my mom took this like 2 days ago. i was having a wiggle on my changing matt.
oh man what a day i have had. slept fine at night but my schedual was about an hour off. i was getting up an hour later that usual.
i got up at 9.30am and spent the rest of the day miserable. mom changed my formula this afternoon. i've had nasty old gas again all evening. i feel a little better now after much burping and farting. i even had a sleep.
i had a good laugh this afternoon. mom was changing my second poopie diaper of the day and i started peeing right as she was about to put the fresh diaper on me. oh man it was great- pee every where. mom wasn't so amused. she said i was diabolical and she was going to make sure i totally go to church in the morning. there is a prayer of thanksgiving tomorrow for my safe arrival or some junk. all mom wants is for the priest to throw some holy water on me.

the first picture is one mom took of me late last night. i just finished off a bottle and my gram is helping me work up a burp.

this is mom. wicks won't be posting today, he is grounded. someone has just been a huge pain in the butt all day long, so he has lost his internet for the day. things went well last night. eating and going back to sleep without a problem. no fussing when getting changed. he even slept in until 7.30am instead of 6am. ever since 9.30 though he has been nothing but evil, evil i say. i had to make a few important phone calls. i managed to get him settled down and asleep, he waits until i am about 5min in to a 45min call when he starts screaming. what the hell man. he should have slept for another 2hrs. sleep was not on wicks list of things to do. nothing but crying and screaming all day long. i think i managed to get 3hrs worth of sleep out of him since all the bullshit started at 9.30. i didn't get a chance to pump until 7pm. i was more than a little uncomfortable. more than once i threatened to call the priest. nothing worked. he had a few poopie diapers and you think that would cheer him up some. the final straw was when i was changing one of the poopies and he started to pee all over the place while i was reaching for a clean diaper. i told his grandad i was going to take him outside and sell him on the street corner. since grandad had to listen to him scream all day too, he fully supported the idea. lucky for him his gram came home and took over. i managed to eat some real food and pump some milk. she managed to get him to shut up for more than 10min. wicks should be back tomorrow, if he's a good boy.

here i am this morning. i was happy then- for about 10min. it's been one of those days. i never poopied yesterday and that always makes me disgruntled. i slept ok but my schedual was a little off. i got up and ate and was changed. i got up at 7am instead of 6am and started with my fussing. mom held me and we fell asleep on the couch for awhile. during my morning diaper changes i tried to pee on mom not once but twice. i missed her but got everything else. while she was reaching for clean diapers i just let go. then eventually i had a poopie and let her think i was done, oh not so. i started pooping in the middle of her changing me. i think she is getting wize to my tricks though because she wasn't even fazed by that.
gram and grandad got up at their usual time and we all decided to go out for the day. oooh a ride in the car. first stop- baby consignment type shop. mom and gram went in, i had to stay in the car with grandad. mom said there were lots of clothes in there and a lot of dirty shit. she came out with sunshades for the car windows- nice one mom. then we all went food gathering in tesco. mom hooked me up with more diapers, a new formula- made for hungry babies, and wipes. she hooked herself up with no less than 5 different chocolate products. after tesco we drove around to this other shop which sells buggies and car seats. once again i got left in the car with grandad. mom came out with some sort of sling for me to ride around in. it cost a lot of money but man it looks sharp and comfy. maybe now mom will take me out for walks. just so you all know- being left in the car in the middle of summer in england is no big deal- it's always fucking cold in this country. it's not like being left in the car in florida or texas. the past few nights we've actually had the heating on, almost july and the heat is on.
and that was my day. the big people had pizza hut for a late lunch, i got stuck with a bottle. i just had another major poopie and my gram gave me a bath. word is she likes giving me baths- oh man. i'm going to hit the bottle and curl up in bed. more tomorrow.

ok got today's pictures done early today. i guess i was being extra cute this morning or mom just wanted to get it over and done with while she had a chance. so far so good. spent a few hours hanging out with my gram last night, mostly asleep. i got my mom to feed me a bottle at 5.30 and then an hour later i told my gram i was hungry and she fed me another whole bottle. hooof was i full. i slept off my milky coma and mom did things like- have a shower and eat. my gram gave me my bedtime bottle and me and mom went right to sleep. didn't get up again until 2am. mom fed me and i got a fresh diaper. then we slept in until 5.30am. i haven't been too fussy today but man an i farting a lot. what the heck is going on down there? i really need a poo, maybe this afternoon.

i've had an ok day today and last night went pretty well too. i got up at my usual times for food and clean diapers and went right back to bed. i didn't wet my bed either. i didn't start getting fussy until 9am. i got up then for my bottle and afterwards i wasn't interesting in settling down. i had lots of poo. i even started to poo while mom was in the middle of cleaning some off my butt. then i tried to pee on her. i cried a bit. mom held me and rubbed my back for me. my tummy hurt a bit. there was a lot of noise coming from my pants. at one point i started having a good squak and then my body went all stiff. there was a massive explosion and i pooed myself a bit. mom laughed at me because one of those goofy smiles spread across my face and i fell asleep. man let me tell you i felt a bit better after that. i had a touch of gas most of the afternoon, lots of farting going on. i'm a guy, that's what we do. i gave my mom a break too and took most of my naps in my bed instead of sleeping on her all day. i'm going to hang out with my gram for a while so my mom can: have a shower, pump some milk, eat food. no pictures yet today. mom hasn't had time to take one yet. maybe later.

since i'm being evil to my mom, she has taken to getting embarrassing pictures of me. i think she is only a few minutes away from calling father b to come down and splash holy water on me. what's wrong with wanting to be held? so far this morning 2 very poopie diapers and one bed wetting. i screamed so much getting changed my gram came downstairs to check on me. mom told her i wet the bed and gram hooked me up with clean sheets.
finally got a picture of my ride-1977 silver cross pram. nothing but quality there. cherry condition in dark green. i would like to pimp it out with a camo paint job, spinners and a bose sound system.

ahhhhhhh now i get it. i had some breast milk straight from the tap today. yeah i'm a month old and never really breast fed before. today my mom made me try it and it was actually pretty cool. i'll think about having another go later. sure beats hanging around waiting for my bottles to warm up. now i can say- get your tits out without being slapped.

what can i say, it's sunday. i didn't feel like getting up to much last night. saturday evening i was super fussy and nothing my mom or gram did made me feel better. mom said she thought i had colic. she let me lay on her chest and rubbed my back for me. she said nice things to me and eventually i settled down enough to get a little sleep. i found out what this colic thing is she was talking about- gas. i had gas. mom says i kept farting all night long. every time she changed my diaper there were explosions going off. i felt loads better. got up at my usual times of midnight, 3 and 6am for clean diapers and food. i wasn't a total goody goody last night. i wet my bed twice. i figured mom had enough of a break so since 6 i've been fussing off and on. nothing major, just lots of hold me and don't even think of putting me in bed.
i spent some time today hanging out with gram while mom ran to the store what grandad. all she got me was more formula. i think i'll raid her chocolate stash when she's not looking. here's me sitting in my rocky chair thing.

hahahahhaahah. i've been up to no good today. my mom was changing my diaper- i was wet. she was yammering on : when are you going to poo today? are the poopies on the way? blah blah blah, you know how moms are. anyway right in the middle of her talking about poo i just let loose and gave her all the poo she could ever ask for. sadly my timing was a little off and she had already gotten a fresh diaper under my butt. so she sealed me up and waited for me to finish my download. a few minutes later she was trying to get that thick yellow slug i produce off my butt when i decided i needed to pee, hey when you gotta go, you gotta go. i peed all over my changing matt. hahahahaha. i'll give you adventures in diaper changing.
then just a little while ago my mom was making something for her dinner. she really hasn't had much to eat the past few days because i keep her so busy. just as she was about to bite into a super duper cheese samich- i started screaming. lucky for her my gram was home and she pawned me off on her.
word is i better get my sweater on, gram is going to take me down the street in my buggy. whooo-hooo. i wonder if i can get some spinners for that thing? i think we are going to see auntie amy and uncle tom and meet grandad at church.

i think my mom has a slow leak, or maybe she is a snake. she is forever making this sssshhhh sound. had an alright day. the home health worker type person came to see me this morning. i wasn't too thrilled by the whole thing. mom took my clothes off me and then my diaper. i was left naked on these scale things with a stranger in the room. akkk. anyway the scale thing said i weighed 9lbs and 6oz. mom says this is further proof that she is not starving me so it won't kill me to wait a minute for my milk to warm up. other than that, just slept and ate all day. i had a bit of an accident and wet my bed. gram took care of getting me a new sheet- stripys! mom said that since my bed needed to dry out a bit i could sleep on her chest- oh happy. so i napped up there while she watched jericho. tomorrow's saturday. i might talk someone into taking me out in my buggy, we'll see.
oh yeah, mom says it's been a month since i hatched out.

ok, here's today's updatery. last night i didn't feel like sleeping. i pretty much kept my mom up until 7am. i slept for an hour or two here and there, but by the time she settled down to get some sleep, i started squaking. snerk. she says i was pretty good during the day though. i made her hold me every chance i got. the bottles and fresh diapers came like clockwork- every 3hrs, and that made me happy. i would drain my bottle and snuggle down on my mom's chest for a nap. if she even thought of putting me in my bed- my eyes would fly open and i would start to fuss. why would i want to sleep in a bed when my mom is warm, soft+squishy and smells like milk?
my gram had to work today so i didn't see her until tonight. i'm begining to think she is not as nice as everyone thinks she is. i was happily sitting with her while my mom took a shower and pumped some milk. next thing i know, the woman took my clothes and dumped me in a warm bath- what the fuck? i hate having a bath. she seems to give me baths quite regularly too. i'm not down with that. and that was my day. i have something called a home health visitor coming to see me first thing in the morning. i'll let you know how that turns out tomorrow.

i've been having a busy day. slept ok last night. i fussed for a few hours before bed when my gram was incharge. that wore me out. i went to sleep around 10pm and didn't get up until 1.30. mom gave me a bottle and some fresh diapers to wear. i was asleep again by 3am and didn't get up until 6 for another round of diapers and bottle.
mom and gram took me out for a ride in the car. first stop was this place: boots. mom always says that it's like cvs- whatever that is. i always thought boots were something you wore on your feet, or stuck up people's asses? but then what do i know. mom and i waited in the car while gram did things in boots. next stop was sainsbury's. that seems to be some kind of food store where modern day man practices his hunter/gathering skills. mom pushed me around in a cart, old ladies stopped and said nice things to me. mom tossed things in the cart. she bought stuff like oatmeal and pringles. whatever, if it's not milk involved, i don't really care.
got home and had a bit of a nap. gram came in and asked if i wanted to go for a ride around town in my buggy- hell yeah! she dressed me up in this 70's looking suit and hat. i'm so retro. then away we went. man all the other babies are just going to die when they see my hot ride. i'll post pictures up later of my buggy, it rocks. have some picture of me until then.

no picture upload today. my mom took a picture but she claims she is too tired to rip it off the camera. i'll make sure she tacks it on tomorrow. today i have kept mom jumping through hoops. i've been up every 2hr like clock work. by the time my mom gets me fed and settled down. she has just enough time to pump some breast milk before i wake up again. i hacked her journal earlier and there is some stuff going on in there which i don't understand. one of these days someone will have to explain them to me. here's what i found: 'i wish the goblin king would come and take me away, for realz. david bowie as jared. oh yeah. if he has a bottle of rum and something smokable- even better. this day is calling for something stronger than calgon.' wtf is that about?
anyway, my gram was at work all day so mom couldn't plam me off until just a minute ago. i heard gram and mom talking and it looks like we might leave the house tomorrow, just so my mom can look at something other than the 4 walls of the livingroom. gram mentioned going out to lunch too, i wonder if that means i can order something other than milk. shout out to american gram-sup crazy lady? hey to g-dad.

ok, picture is now up- check me out, how good do i look in red?

today i have been down right evil, just because i can. hahahahha. i can scream and cry all i want for no real reason and my mom can't do anything about it. the only time i've been quiet for longer than 5min was when her and grandad put me in the car so mom could visit the doctors. i slept on the way home. other than that i've been crying and fussing all day long. the only thing which makes me happy is holding me. my mom said she was going to send me to live with my dad, i'm not concerned. my gram is in charge now. i'll have her worn out in an hour or so. i wonder if anything good is on tv tonight. i wonder if i could stay up for 24hrs straight. today's pictures were taken minutes apart and pretty much sum up my day.

oh man what a night. i hung out with my mom watching american psycho on bbc2. mom says- crap film of a great book but man did christian bale look fine. whatever that means. gram hooked me up with a bottle at midnight30. she was watching the negotiator, samuel l jackson- man he's in everything. went to bed after my bottle and slept in until 4am. i decided to give my old mom a break. there was a lot of talk about goblin kings and gypsies the other night so i figured i better cut out my sleep depervation project for atleast a night. today i upped my biological warfare offensive instead. through the chemical reaction known as digestion, i managed to turn yummy warm milk into a stinking foul smelling yellow mush and best of all it shoots out my ass at regular intervals. between 4am and 6am i filled 2 diapers for my old mom to change. hahahaha. wait until dad gets back he'll be gagging at the stink i can churn out. it's father's day today. word has it my dad is most likely recovering from a bitch of a hangover. he went to dr martin's 40th birthday party last night. can't wait to hear the stories. more later when i get my picture up. peace out bytchz.

ok, here is my photo spread for today. since it's father's day and my dad is away on business, mom took loads of pictures of me. i swear she's as bad as a japanese tourist with that camera, all the time taking pictures.

here is todays picture. my gram changed my bed when she found out i peed in it. fresh sheets- whoohooo. everyone loves fresh sheets, but man they are pink, what's up with that? had an alright day. spent a good part of it hanging out with the granfolks. watched field of dreams on tv, people talk shit about kevin costner but man is that a great film. ate loads, grandad says i eat more than my dad. i slept a lot so i can continue my sleep depervation project tonight. ahahahahha. i guess that's the news.

my plan to slowly drive my mother crazier is in full effect. right now she is so desperate for food i caught her eating a moldly bagel. it had a little bit of white fuzz on the bottom, normally this is enough to cause the rest of the bag to be thrown out, but damn if she didn't eat one. hahahaha. operation sleep deprivation is going well. i started screaming at 1.30am, got my warm milk and a fresh diaper.i also needed a fresh sleep suit, mom dressed me in that horrible pink thing. man i hope no one come around today and sees me dressed like a big girl. i laughed because i wet my bed, but then it wasn't so funny when mom started cursing because we were out of clean sheets. doh. will need to plan bed wettings a little better with laundry day. i fussed so mom had to hold me until almost 3am when i finally decided to get a little more sleep. i got up again at 6am, man was i starving. got another fresh diaper which was nice since the one i was wearing was full of pee. after my warm milk i fussed some more so mom had to hold me until i fell asleep. got up again at 9.30am. clean diaper was duely applied and a bottle full of warm milk was instantly supplied. oh yeah. finished off my milk and fell right to sleep. not a bad way to spend a few hours.

i managed to create a blog today, go me. this is what my mom wrote about in her journal today:wicks is already 3 weeks today and so far things are actually going better than i thought they would. it's been a huge help to have my motherinlaw around to carry some of the load. last night she gave him a bath and took over sitting with him while i ate my yoghurt with strawberries and bananas. i do love the look on his little face when he drifts off into a milk coma, his eyes roll up in his head and he gets this little grin on his face. it's like if i had smoked a huge block of hash, i'd make that same face.
this morning was a level 5+ off the charts poopie mess. i heard it coming out while he was in his bed. i waited for the explosions to die down and picked him up to change him. i got the diaper off. bright yellow mushy crap everywhere. he got it on his feet, all up the leg, in every little crease. so i bust out some wipes and start cleaning. in the middle of wiping, more starts shooting out his ass. good christ. i managed to get some wipes down to catch the new stuff. then the pee came. huge arc all the way over his shoulder. i managed to get that covered and contained, just in time to deal with yet another poo explosion. god what a mess. finally everything stopped and i managed to get him clean, changed and into a fesh suit.
due to lack of sleep today i will run on drooling idiot mode. creature fell asleep around 11pm last night, was up at 2.30. finally went back to sleep just before 5am. got up at 7.30am and just went back to sleep at 10am.

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